Tuesday, 3 December 2013


Her cheerful personality and the way she handled my son in the first few weeks of daycare made me think that this young lady has something special. I didn't know what it was until one day we happened to walk home together as she was going to babysit my neighbour's four-year old girl.

She had to work part time as a caretaker in her early twenties while pursuing study in the university because her parents could not financially support her. Her hard work was finally paid off since she graduated last year. This year marks her seventh year working at the daycare and it seems to me that she loves her job as much as the children love her. No parents will ever doubt her capability in looking after her own children in the future. However, she plans to change her current job sometime soon as she needs working experience related to her university major to which I absolutely agree. I asked her whether she also plans to get married soon to which she replied with smile "I have no boyfriend" and then continued "I used to be in a 10-year relationship but my ex dumped me because I am not beautiful. The men here are only into beautiful girls". Honestly, in my opinion, she is one of the prettiest real ladies in the country where natural beauty is a rare thing and aesthetical surgery are common practices. Behind her modest nature, she perfectly glows in her late twenties thanks to her loving character and intelligence. I assured her that she doesn't have to worry about it as I know someone who has similar story to hers, and that someone was me few years ago :).

I started to work part-time since I was nineteen in order to ease the burden of my mother. I also regularly helped her by doing groceries shopping to the traditional market in the morning and continued working in the kitchen before going for my morning class. I remembered it clearly when I had my backpack full of containers of food to be delivered to the customer prior to going to the university. As for my part-time job, I worked as a private teacher and later as a teacher in two private institutions in my hometown from which I paid my expenses and tuition fees. I had no boyfriends back then, not one, and thought that I would never have any. I have always had an inferiority complex about myself since the boys I was interested in never had the same feeling while those who liked me were not my type. Besides, I was not popular at all and had very little of self-confidence. While the girls my age were picked up by their boyfriends after the class or went out on Saturday night for a movie, I was all by myself most of the time if not with my girlfriends.

When I finished university, I worked in a project that only involved me and my supervisor while keeping my part time job at one institution. After a year, I was hesitant to continue as the job took me nowhere and both jobs offered no single chance for me to meet my future soulmate. I decided to take a challenge by moving to Jakarta, the city of hope. After a couple of years being in the capital, I still had no luck with boys whilst my university friends were getting married one by one. I was getting tired of having the so-called pressure in the form of questions "do you have a boyfriend?" followed by one another "why?" and "don't be a picky or you'll regret later". I kept asking myself what was wrong with me but I never found the answer..maybe it was just a matter of time. For few years, my situation remained the same until I arrived at the point where I was fed up with others' harsh comments and decided that I had to focus on other important things in life. I later learnt to live my life to the fullest until one day, in my late twenties, I was destined to meet my future soulmate, in a place, which my colleagues jokingly said, was cursed for single women. God works in mysterious way,  indeed.

We ended the conversation as soon as I reached my floor and she continued to her destination while waving at us, still with sincere smile on her pretty face.

To the caretaker of my son, by writing this, I just want to let you know that you are precious and you have everything you need to attract good men. It is just that you may have to work a little bit in finding the right person that you deserve at the right time. In the meantime, go find your dream job and explore the world as much as you can! When that time comes for you to chase another dream, I know that not only my son and other children will miss you, but also your colleagues and we, the parents, will miss you more.

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